I am worth showing up for; you are too
My writing career started as a joke. After trying and failing many times to get me to start writing, my friend’s final attempt was hilarious but compelling. On this fateful day, he turned to me and said, “when you get to heaven, God will let you in, but He will slap you first for wasting your talent” or something along those lines.
I remember laughing at the time, but his words stuck with me, and it was not long before i started my blog on WordPress, which eventually launched my professional writing career with Pulse. ng in 2015. From then on, writing became my life. It was my bread and butter, source of joy, outlet, everything.
I wrote like no man’s business for over five years (3 with Pulse. ng and 2 with Business Insider sub-Saharan Africa). In sickness and health, on working days, weekends, and holidays, i poured myself into my job through burnouts and all on working days, weekends, and holidays. I was continually wracking my brains as i looked for new angles to report trending stories and creative ways to tell stories about anything.
I lived and breathed my job until 2020 when the pandemic happened, and I lost my job. At first, i was happy. I needed the break after over five years of going non-stop. I was glad that i could spend time with my family without having my laptop attached to my lap. I rejoiced over the delight that came with waking up and not immediately having to come up with a list of article ideas. My brain was relieved, and so was i.
Then one day, it got old. I missed the craziness, creativity, productivity like an addict desperate for his/her next fix. I missed typing away like a crazy person daily. So, what did i do? I decided i would start a newsletter — The Breakdown with Inem Udodiong, but it just was not the same.
Was it the fact that i was no longer getting paid for writing? Or the fact that i did not have deadlines, structure or a steady amount of readers? I was not sure bit i knew it was not the same. It took me a while, but i finally realized what the problem was. The thing is that I had gotten used to going all out for my job. I was used to showing up for my readers, colleagues, everyone else. Now that i had no one, nothing to show up for but myself, it was not as exciting or fulfilling.
We do our best work for others, reserving nothing for ourselves. We work hard on our company’s corporate brand while our personal brand suffers. Parents give their best to their kids, leaving nothing for themselves or their relationships which explains why they can feel like strangers when the kids leave the nest. We are quick to say nice things to others and make others feel good about themselves but save the worst, self-deprecating words for ourselves. We are our best selves to everyone else except when it comes to us.
As Zig Ziglar, American author, salesman, and motivational speaker, rightly puts it, “The first step in solving a problem is to recognize that it does exist.” Now that i know what the problem is, i can fix it. And that’s exactly what i am doing right now. To regain my love for writing, structure and productivity, I have decided to start a 30-day writing challenge. I plan on showing up daily. Why? Because I care about myself that much. Because i am worth showing up for. You are too!
This article is the first of my 30 days challenge.
